I often say to women with whom I work, ‘Treat yourself as your best lover would.’
Well of course you would, Sharon, wouldn’t you?
YES!
Because, even in the 21st century, zillions of girls are being taught to put others before themselves in all kinds of ways.
So, what’s wrong with a bit of altruism?
Nothing, unless it’s at the expense of yourself.
Then it becomes an unhealthy self-sacrifice, seeing yourself as less entitled than the ‘other.’ Of less importance, secondary and less worthy.
And on Valentine’s Day, when the focus is on spoiling your loved other, it’s a good time to encourage you to focus on yourself with as much passion and devotion.
OK, OK!
I know some of you, like me, are not in a relationship. And some of you will be in a relationship where there’s little, if any, love. But the principle still holds…
Even more so…
Treat yourself as your best lover would!
What would that look like for you? How would it feel? How would it sound? How would it taste and how would it smell? Use all of your senses to imagine a delicious picture of how that would be…
If you’re shrugging the idea off big-time, know that you were born to be loved, to be held, to be protected. And to be nurtured so you could become, eventually, the beautiful woman you were meant to be.
My heart goes out to you if, also like me, you didn’t get much, if any, of that kind of loving.
All the more reason to start giving it to yourself now!
How?
Familiarise yourself with love…
Start watching out for small acts of love you can find in everyday life and, as you do, notice how you feel…
The elderly couple holding hands. The warm smile of the woman in the baker’s shop who handed you your bread. Children with arms around each other’s shoulders. The giving of a tissue by a stranger to someone needing it on a train.
Small acts of everyday kindness signal the presence of love!
And then…
Look deeply into your own eyes in a mirror for at least one minute. Lock your gaze on them. Don’t deviate but keep looking deeply deep into your own eyes. Let your face soften and drink in your gaze.
For that, magnificent woman, is how your best lover looks at you and shows you their love!
Love and wild warm wishes…
You are perfect imperfection
A divine light that yearns to shine.
So shine, woman, shine!
PS… There’s a key concept to creating healthy and loving relationships which is so simple it will blow your mind. And blowing your mind about love is what Module #4 of my Down-&-Dirty Spirituality School is all about. If you’re a spiritually curious woman who’d give her eye teeth to get first dibs on it, I’ve got just one place left on the Beta version starting soon. Want that to be you? Then email me here right now…